TruceWorks' Clear Process combines relation based communication theory with principles of non-violent communication. It is designed to support two members in a guided exchange of messages and responses to resolve every day conflicts.
Non -violent principles give guidance to people to express their feelings in a non-judgmental way and suggest that under our most reactive emotions are needs that are not being met. Being able to focus on our needs and to express them in language that encourages communication is essential to the ending of Conflicts.
Learning to express our needs in relationship to others, so that we are responded to by having our needs recognized and hopefully met, and learning to reciprocate, whereby we also learn to respond to other people's needs , is fundamental to human growth as well as resolution of conflicts.
Because our basic needs are met in relationship, when our relationships are disrupted, as they are in conflicts, we need to be able re -establish our connection with others. The Clear Process structures our communication so that we are receiving and giving more attuned and reciprocal responses and this helps establish reconnection.
The five questions and two Response Boxes of the Clear Communication Process re -create basic relational dynamics to provide an experience of being responded to and responding to another person in ways that can actually meet some of our relational needs. Conflicts result when basic relational needs are not being met.
The first step helps to CLARIFY what has caused our conflict with another and to communicate it in a non-threatening way.
The next two steps help us to LOCATE within ourselves our feelings and needs that have been activated by the conflict.
We are asked to EXPRESS our needs and feelings to the other person, once again in non-threatening language.
The fourth step asks us to express what we need the other person to understand about our feelings and/or needs. This step supports the experience of our need for an ATTUNED response, i.e. an accurate reflection of what we have expressed. This step is followed by using the REFLECT box to give and receive feedback, until an accurate reflection is achieved.
The fifth step re -creates the experience of RECIPROCITY. Relationships are based on many reciprocal exchanges: giving and taking, the mutuality of expression and response, listening and speaking and negotiating compromise. In answering this step and by using the RESPONSE BOX to negotiate what is needed to end the conflict both members experience the back and forth aspect of communication which is at the heart of relationship.
The REFLECTION BOX and The RESPONSE BOX give the two members the opportunity to relate to what the other person is communicating and to reflect back, meeting the other persons need for an attuned response.
These are the five stages of the Clear Communication Process which facilitates reconnection
with another person that you are in conflict with.
Each of the five questions you answer and the responses you give serve to redirect the flow
of communication so that each person is supported by the other person's responses to feel